That little voice

Maybe it isn’t real

Maybe it’s just a euphoria

Maybe it’s just an excitement that one would feel in a summer love.

Maybe it won’t last long.

Maybe it’s just from the old memories.

Maybe I’m just not satisfied because I wasn’t the one who called it off.

Maybe I just wanted a payback.. sort of a revenge..

To make him feel what i felt.

To make him suffer with each memories we made.. the way I was.. the way I am.

How every corner of the street would remind him of me,

How every laughter would hurt his chest as it carved my image on.

 

I really hope that was it.

 

I hope it would fade.

I hope that I would get over it soon after I went back.

I hope I no longer seek for his voice or the image of his face.

I hope I no longer wait for that figure to show up and surprise me again.

I hope I gave up that false hope.

I hope I did not hope.

 

I really thought I’ve moved on.

 

I thought I got over it.

I thought I have walked my own path.

I thought wrong.

 

How I still care.

How I still want to hug him tight

How I still feel my heart twitch when his smile fades

How I still believe.

 

I pushed him far, so far, to the back of my mind. Little did I know that it’ll come back and haunt me twice as bad as it did.